Apparently, "3 out of 33 comedy scripts that went to pilot were written by women. That is 9%," while only "6 out of 36 drama scripts went to pilot were written by women. That is 16%." In case you're bad at math, those numbers aren't pretty.
So what's the deal? Are we still dealing with a boys club in Hollywood? How else do you explain this ridiculousness (from WomenandHollywood.com):
NBC had no comedies written by women and Fox had no dramas written by women HBO had one female written pilot in two years. FX nothing. Lifetime nothing. USA nothing.
To quote Jezebel's hortense,"LIFETIME! Television for motherfucking women! In the words of Angelina from Jersey Shore: "Um, hello?!?"
THE ONION—A new study released this week by the U.S. Bureau of Masochism has concluded that American nipples are critically under-clamped, bolstering long-held suspicions that the nation is rapidly losing interest in the thin, delectable line between pleasure and pain.
According to the study, which surveyed a wide swath of citizens who have been very, very bad, 78 percent of all U.S. nipples are not being pinched, tweaked, or otherwise constricted in a severe enough manner. In addition, the study found that nearly 90 percent of all Americans are not currently down on their hands and knees, begging for more.
"The vast majority of U.S. citizens are just not receiving the physical punishment they deserve," said Masochism Bureau director Geoff Knowlton, who was permitted by his mistress, Alexandria, to meet with reporters despite being unfit for anything but groveling at her boot heels. "Unless something is done—whether with a riding crop, a stiff wooden paddle, or a series of humiliating commands to bark like a dog—this problem will only get worse."
Love this blog called Dealbreaker by funnies Marisa and Dave. They have long list of reasons why they won't date you, including:
- You're Lady GaGa
- You don't like watching Degrassi
- You have swine flu
- You're an American Apparel Model
- You're Jeff Goldblum (“God creates dinosaurs. God destroys dinosaurs. God creates Man. Man destroys God. Man creates Dinosaurs”)
- You have the same name as my dad
- You hate unicorns
- You won't kiss me after oral
- You don't "get" Radiohead
- You're not Mark Ruffalo
and many, many more (You're too hot, You say "vagine")
Some of my dealbreakers:
- you are homeless
- you are grossed out by body hair on women
- you are a republican
- you hit on me using Myspace
- you don't like to swim
- you are Mormon
- you lied about graduating from high school
- you constantly talk about how awesome California is
- you are Glen Beck/Bill O'Reily/Fox News/Ann Coulter/Newt Gingrich/an asshole
Ever gone through Bust Magazine's Girl Wide Web links page on their website?
Bust is one of my pop culture bibles. It is seriously one of the coolest magazines ever made and their website is rad and filled with cool shit. Their Girl Wide Web is a page of user submitted links with a sex section titled Sex-E, and a subsection on Erotica & Porn (I wish these two weren't lumped together but whatevs). I love trolling through these links.
Yes, there are a lot of bad personal blogs and a shitload of weird/shitty/hot/good/awful erotic fiction sites, but you also come across some gems. Like this one I found today titled Artistic Nude Male Photography which links to a url called www.primeviews.com.
The user submitted link description reads: Amateur site featuring a collection of black and white self portrait nude photos. The site is aimed at a female audience and shows the nude male form in an erotic but tasteful and artistic manner.
Hey ladies.
Are you wet yet?
You know by the following bombs i just dropped on you that this site is going to be hilarious:
1. the title of the listing is Artistic Nude Male Photography
2. the url name sounds like a Miami real estate company (only a dude would register a domain name called primeviews.com. I wonder how many retired couples looking to buy a condo accidentally go to his site on a daily basis)
3.the use of the following words in the link description: nude, male, form, erotic, but tasteful, artistic
Normally I would shy away from reading reports by an organization called the Parents Television Council because I'm always a little scared of any type of organization trying to curb 1st amendment rights - not that this org is trying to do that but I'm always brought back to images of people burning books or rap cds or condemning nudity on tv.
However, this report's findings are SHOCKING.
Some of the major findings in the report:
Incidents of violence against women and teenage girls are increasing on television at rates that far exceed the overall increases in violence on television. Violence, irrespective of gender, on television increased only 2% from 2004 to 2009, while incidents of violence against women increased 120% during that same period.
The most frequent type of violence against women on television was beating (29%), followed by credible threats of violence (18%), shooting (11%), rape (8%), stabbing (6%), and torture (2%). Violence against women resulted in death 19% of the time.
Violence towards women or the graphic consequences of violence tends overwhelmingly to be depicted (92%) rather than implied (5%) or described (3%).
Every network but ABC demonstrated a significant increase in the number of storylines that included violence against women between 2004 and 2009.
Although female victims were primarily of adult age, collectively, there was a 400% increase in the depiction of teen girls as victims across all networks from 2004 to 2009.
Fox stood out for using violence against women as a punch line in its comedies -- in particular Family Guy and American Dad -- trivializing the gravity of the issue of violence against women.
From 2004 to 2009 there was an 81% increase in incidences of intimate partner violence on television.
Yowza! Total sad face at this.
One would think that maybe Lifetime's repeats of Mother May I Sleep With Danger? could be the cause of this drastic increase but the study only looked at the major broadcasting networks (FOX, ABC, CBS, and NBC)! Imagine the results if they checked out HBO, USA, Showtime and FX?
As a culture are we really that cool with showing women getting raped and tortured on CSI vs some hot nakedness?
I'm totally writing a letter to each channel's president to tell them that as a female viewer, I am disgusted at the amount of depictions of violence against women they choose to feature on their networks and that they can count out my viewership if these alarming trends continue.
Here's the networks addys if you want to write your own emails or letters (ironically 3 of the 4 network presidents are women!):
Mr. Jeff Zucker, President NBC Entertainment 30 Rockefeller Plaza New York, NY 10112 (818) 840-4444
Uhhhh.....yeah. I couldn't resist clicking on a link on Yahoo News that read "Why Do Women Have Sex?" I was expecting something hilarious and I was not let down. First off Yahoo News ran the story, copied from US News (a bastion of........), which ran the story of a study done in Texas (only in Texas folks...only in Texas), AT A UNIVERSITY mind you, which polled women about why they had sex.
And guess what the researchers said? women aren't all that different from men.
Doh! Damn that was probably a couple grand in research grants down the drain.
They found that the number one reason women had sex? They were attracted to their partner and are seeking sexual pleasure. WHAT?!?!??! Impossible!!!!
That's right guys, want more love from your lady? Do some fucking sit ups and give good head.
They also got some hilarious answers like: Many women said they had sex to bring them closer to God.
That's definitely my reason for sex! I'm always like "oh god! oh god!"
So I went to a best friend’s wedding this past weekend.I was a bridesmaid, something that I’ve never done.
Weddings do a lot to you.They make you eat and drink too much, they make you think about love. They also make you horny.While listening to the Rabbi talk about what love and marriage mean and what makes people want to get married and stay married, all I could think of was how I was going to get into the pants of the groom’s hot cousin with the Jew fro.
After the ceremony, the party began and my attempts at a hook up with Jew-fro cousin were going really well. We hung out during the party, gettin' a little tipsy. I sat by him on the party bus back to the hotel and then we went up to his room and started fooling around. I asked if he had a condom, he said no, I said I had one in my room (cuz im prepared like that, what what) and left to go get it. I got to my room and realized I didn't have my room key on me. So I went downstairs to the front desk, got a key, went back up to my room, and got the condom. But by then I had drunkenly forgotten what room the dude was in. I knocked on a ton of doors trying to find him but alas, no hot dude. I don't even remember if I was on the right floor. I was pretty drunk at that point.
So I gave up and went to bed. That's right ladies, I failed at a hook up because I couldn't remember what room the dude was in.
SAD
The next day in the lobby he was like "what happened last night?" I told him the story and he laughed. Awkwardly, we were on the same flight back to Phoenix (where he connected to L.A.) but thankfully he had a sense of humor (I don't bang - or fail at banging - unfunny people) and we were able to joke about the whole thing.
I am actually kinda bummed I didn't bag him. That's what weddings are for right?
oh wellz...
Every time I attend a friend’s wedding (which is getting more and more often) I just can’t help but fall in love with love and weddings and parties and hot cousins.Weddings are one of the best aphrodisiacs because they put all the right pieces in place for some hot sex: food, alcohol, dancing, happiness, out-of-town relatives, hotels, jacuzzis, and more alcohol.
Except for my FAIL at hooking up with the groom's cousin, I did all the required things a bridesmaid should do at her best friend's wedding:
During my bridesmaid speech, I embarrassed several of the bride’s ex-boyfriends in attendance at the wedding when I stated that “I’ve never liked any of your boyfriends before this one.”
I ate too much food and almost couldn’t fit into my bridesmaid dress.
I offered the “Last chance, are you sure you want to do this?You can jump ship right now” speech to the bride as I helped her get dressed.
I cried too much when I saw her in her beautiful gown walking down the aisle.
According to ArtBistro, model Kathleen Neil was arrested at the Metropolitan Museum of Art for public lewdness while posing for art photographer Zach Hyman in the arms and armor department of the museum. It seems the museum can house paintings and photography of naked women but not real naked women.
On another note, Zach Hyman has some cool photos of nude models interacting with NYC and its inhabitants.
I quite like his stuff.
All you Pool Girls taking photos of naked dudes out there - be careful!
On a recent poolgirl outing we came across this swarthy gentleman:
Naturally we asked him to drop his panties and let us snap some hot dick pics. He agreed and suggested we all head to an after party where he'd let us discreetly photograph him. We followed him to the after party (which was lame btw) only to have him dodge the photo session by repeatedly trying to feel up Lady of Leisure on the couch:
Let's be honest, who doesn't like a little game of Grabby McGrab Hands now and again?
But dude wouldn't give up the dick! And to add insult to injury, his gross friend, this dude:
called us "bitches" and then couldn't hang when we tried an have a semi-intelligent conversation about re-appropriating language (we even used small words).
And finally, nothing ends a night of failure better than some old fashioned girl hate. One of Sir Boob-A-Lot's female friends called us "floozies" when her boobs went unmolested.
(Amy Sherman-Pallidino, creator of The Gilmore Girls, with star Lauren Graham)
Posts
