You Can Find Penis Anywhere

Budapest Street Art

Always a Bridesmaid...Not Really Into Being a Bride

So I went to a best friend’s wedding this past weekend. I was a bridesmaid, something that I’ve never done.

Weddings do a lot to you. They make you eat and drink too much, they make you think about love. They also make you horny. While listening to the Rabbi talk about what love and marriage mean and what makes people want to get married and stay married, all I could think of was how I was going to get into the pants of the groom’s hot cousin with the Jew fro.

After the ceremony, the party began and my attempts at a hook up with Jew-fro cousin were going really well. We hung out during the party, gettin' a little tipsy. I sat by him on the party bus back to the hotel and then we went up to his room and started fooling around. I asked if he had a condom, he said no, I said I had one in my room (cuz im prepared like that, what what) and left to go get it. I got to my room and realized I didn't have my room key on me. So I went downstairs to the front desk, got a key, went back up to my room, and got the condom. But by then I had drunkenly forgotten what room the dude was in. I knocked on a ton of doors trying to find him but alas, no hot dude. I don't even remember if I was on the right floor. I was pretty drunk at that point.

So I gave up and went to bed. That's right ladies, I failed at a hook up because I couldn't remember what room the dude was in.

SAD

The next day in the lobby he was like "what happened last night?" I told him the story and he laughed. Awkwardly, we were on the same flight back to Phoenix (where he connected to L.A.) but thankfully he had a sense of humor (I don't bang - or fail at banging - unfunny people) and we were able to joke about the whole thing.

I am actually kinda bummed I didn't bag him. That's what weddings are for right?
oh wellz...

Every time I attend a friend’s wedding (which is getting more and more often) I just can’t help but fall in love with love and weddings and parties and hot cousins. Weddings are one of the best aphrodisiacs because they put all the right pieces in place for some hot sex: food, alcohol, dancing, happiness, out-of-town relatives, hotels, jacuzzis, and more alcohol.

Except for my FAIL at hooking up with the groom's cousin, I did all the required things a bridesmaid should do at her best friend's wedding:

• During my bridesmaid speech, I embarrassed several of the bride’s ex-boyfriends in attendance at the wedding when I stated that “I’ve never liked any of your boyfriends before this one.”
• I ate too much food and almost couldn’t fit into my bridesmaid dress.
• I offered the “Last chance, are you sure you want to do this? You can jump ship right now” speech to the bride as I helped her get dressed.
• I cried too much when I saw her in her beautiful gown walking down the aisle.
  
• I took too many photos.
• I drank too much champagne.
• I danced awkwardly to rap music.
  

Wedding completed.

And speaking of weddings........this site is hilarious!

PoolBoy on the East Coast!

So hey y'all. I was just in NYC and Boston, hitting on some hot dudes, and meeting up with people to work on the first issue of PoolBoy Magazine!

here's a run down of what i didz:

Boston:
- Met up with PoolBoy James. We went to a UFC fight, which initially i thought was going to be totally horrible but i ended up really impressed with the hot dudes there. UFC fighter bodies are the shit. Hot hot hot. Plus lots of hot dudes from Brazil....yeah.

- I went to the Isabella Gardner Museum which was beautiful. A very interesting woman from the early 1900s. Check it out.

NYC (aka Hot dude land)
- I photographed writer and musician, Mishka Shubaly in Greenpoint. We're running a hot interview with him called "Take it Off" in the first issue. Here's some teasers:


I photographed him in his apartment amidst strewn Magnum condom wrappers (word up ladies). He gave me a vibrator (long story). And then we went to a nearby park and ate chips.

I also was able to check out the Museum of Sex!


Which had a very interesting exhibit on animals and sex, composed of videos, scientific data, photographs and really cool paper mache sculptures:


The other main exhibition was on Sex in Film. It documented sex on films from the beginning of movie making up to the present and included everything from Victorian era "stag" films to Girls Gone Wild (and Boys Gone Wild). It was weird standing in a room full of TV screens showing pornos through the ages with a bunch of tourists from around the world. But everyone seemed OK with it.

The upstairs exhibition had a lots of interesting stuff including photographs of people with their sex toys, materials on sex education for children throughout the ages, fetishes and kinky sex videos and objects, and a cool stop-animation video of robots having sex.

I definitely recommend checking out this museum if you are in NYC and are sick of the MOMA. It's got rotating exhibitions that deal with all sorts of issues related to sexuality and it's very informative and interesting. Plus it's got a gift store filled with dildos and books!

All in all it was an awesome trip! I got to network for the magazine a bunch and met some really cool people who are doing cool things and helping out PoolBoy.

Can't wait for this first issue to cum out!!!

Uh WTF?

I found this picture on the hotel computer (under the folder Photos) on my trip to Mexico.
Don't know what it is but it's fucking hilarious.

I submitted it to Picture Unrelated which is a great photo blog. The url in the right bottom corner of the pic is from this site, which appears to be Greek.

The joys of traveling!